Women & Jealousy

If you've ever felt jealousy gripping you - I mean really gripping you - you'll know exactly what I mean. Your heart thumps against your breast, your breath seems to rasp in your throat as you gasp for air, and your emotions seem to ricochet between unbridled rage and helpless panic. Not only can jealousy suck your self-esteem right out from under your nose, it can seemingly rob you of any capacity to function normally at all. Jealousy has the capacity to break up relationships and families and destroy careers.


For many women,  jealousy has become a consuming emotion that afflicts them like a disease. They feel no power or control when an "attack" overwhelms them. One of the most interesting things about jealousy is that it appears to be becoming more and more prevalent in the modern world. But, even though it can act a little like a disease, it is not one. You cannot catch it from someone else. So just why is jealousy more prevalent among us than ever before?

Women in the western world have seen their status within society change markedly over the last few decades. We now have more opportunities to flourish and prosper on our own merits than ever before in history. In short, women in general have an unprecedented degree of choice in their lives.


Even women who may be appalled by Sex and the City can recognise that they can largely choose the terms of their romantic relationships. They can choose with whom and for how long. They can choose a career, or kids, or both. They can choose to go for it all. So why do so many women fail to celebrate this new-found freedom and hard-won equality? Why is it that instead of feeling empowered many women still feel insecure, trapped, and afraid? Because with the power to choose comes the chance to lose.

This simple truth holds a magical power to rescue you from the vicious grip of jealousy. But you must work hard to tap into this power - you will not feel it by simply reading the words.

You will also need courage. Women who believe they cannot cope with the possibility of losing tend to be the ones who get jealous. Jealousy claws at you when you feel afraid that you are about to lose something that you perceive to be precious, or something to which you believe you are entitled.


What happens when you feel jealous? How do your emotions make you behave? You become less likeable, more unreasonably demanding, less trusting, less objective - in fact you become less of everything you WANT to be, and more of the things you don't want to be. Your behaviour has the opposite effect of what you intend, and your jealousy makes you more likely to "lose" whatever it is that you're trying to protect!

On the other hand, women who can accept that there is always a possibility of losing tend to cope well by making the most of what they have. Instead of feeling afraid of losing their partner, a precious job, or maybe a close friend, they relish each moment of opportunity to be with the person (or within the job) of their choice. This attitude is what sets non-jealous women apart from jealous women. It is a very attractive attitude. Furthermore, once attracted by it, great partners and/or great jobs tend to stick by you!


Next steps for jealous women…

Recognise that you're only human, and accept with good grace the fact that you cannot make the whole world behave as you would like. However:

* you do have the power to choose many things

* you can always influence the behaviour of others (but not control it)

* if you choose wisely, and use your influence positively, you will maximise the likelihood of feeling confident, secure, and highly-valued

As a woman you can cope with far more than you think. Remind yourself of this fact now and then.

Take full responsibility for your jealousy - nobody is causing it but you. And, if you only remember one thing , remember this: if you let jealousy drive your behaviour, you will always increase the chance of losing what you are trying to keep.


There's no doubt about it - jealousy sucks!

Spending time with kids for free.

I thought it would be useful to list some ways to have fun with your kids without spending a lot of money :



Have a reading marathon.

Write stories together.

Play soccer.

Paint or draw together.

Create a fort in your living room out of blankets or cardboard boxes.

Go on a hike.

Have a sunset picnic at a park or beach.

Play board games.

Play kickball.

Get up early, pack breakfast, and have a sunrise breakfast.

Go to a museum.

Go to a playground.

Play hide-and-seek.

Have a pillow fight.

Ride bikes.

Build sandcastles.

Rent a dvd and make popcorn.

Tell stories.

Have a scavenger hunt.

Make mazes or puzzles for each other to solve.

Play card games.

Garden together.

Bake cookies (let the kids help).

Go to the zoo.

Go to the library.

Shop at a thrift shop.

Create a blog together.

Create a scrapbook.

Make a movie using a camcorder and computer.

Learn to play music.

Fingerpaint.

Make play dough from scratch.

Make homemade mini pizzas.

Buy popsicles.

Make hand-painted T-shirts.

Set up a hammock, make lemonade, relax.

Go to a pool.

Go to a public place, people watch, and make up imaginary stories about people.

Visit family.

Write letters to family.

Paint or decorate the kids’ room.

Make milkshakes.

Play freeze tag.

Create a treasure hunt for them (leaving clues around the house or yard).

Decorate a pair of jeans.

Do a science experiment.

Play games online.

Teach them to play chess.

Learn magic tricks.

Create a family book, with information and pictures about each family member.

Fly kites.

Go snorkeling.

Barbecue.

Volunteer.

Donate stuff to charity.

Compete in a three-legged or other race.

Create an obstacle course.

Pitch a tent and sleep outside with marshmallows.

Roast marshmallows.

Play loud music and dance crazy.

Write and produce a play (to perform before other family members).

Paint each other’s faces.

Have a water balloon fight.

Have a gun-fight with those foam dart guns.

Explore your yard and look for insects.

Go for a walk and explore the neighborhood.

Go jogging.

Take pictures of nature.

Play a trivia game.

Make up trivia questions about each other.

Make hot cocoa.

Play house.

Decorate the house with decorations you make.

Make popsicles.

Play school.

Do shadow puppets.

Make a comic book.

Play in the rain.

Make mud pies.

Blow bubbles.

Take turns saying tongue twisters.

Sing songs.

Tell ghost stories in the dark with a flashlight.

Build stuff with Legos.

Give them a bubble bath.

Play with squirt guns.

Play video games together.

Play wiffleball.

Play nerf football.

Build a rocket from a kit.

Bake a cake and decorate it.

Play dress-up.

Thumb-wrestle, play mercy, or have a tickle fight.

Make a gingerbread house, or decorate gingerbread men.

Learn and tell each other jokes.

Play basketball.

Learn to juggle.

Walk barefoot in the grass and pick flowers.

Build paper airplanes and have a flying contest.

Prank call their grandparents, using disguised, humorous voices.

Santa Barbara & Universal Studios - LA

Still on summer mode where I literally walked with Sun , nevertheless the fun we had........ treasured memories ! We started driving from Bay Area......packed with lots of snacks and music , it took us about 6 hours to reach Santa Barbara , the City of Celebrities.

Santa Barbara -  situated on an east-west trending section of coastline, the longest such section on the west coast, between the steeply-rising Santa Ynez Mountains and the sea, and having a Mediterranean climate, it is called California's "South Coast", and is also sometimes referred to casually as the "American Riviera."

We stopped in Carpinteria and put up for 3 days at a friend's apartment. Magnificent beauty of mother nature , sea breeze and fun...

Day 1 spent fully at Getty Park, LA. The beautiful arts and crafts of  Renaissance Era and French Revolution was  breathtaking ! It felt that I'm gone back to time , a total 1800's effect ! That evening we've decided just to laze and sit at the Getty Park , beautiful view of the Rose garden and resting lounge.

Day 2 , though our legs were paining due to our non stop walks in Getty Park , we still managed walking all the way out in the Universal Studios. We went on the Mummy ride , Jurassic Park and Waterworld. It was an awesome day for us.

Day 3 , due to all the tiredness , we went to the beach and walked around the downtown.

Slept like anything and drove back to Bay Area the next day.